16 Days Of Action Against Gender Violence – Day 7

As many reading here are aware, the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Violence began on 25 November. Several bloggers more on top their shit than I have been blogging on this from the beginning. You can call me Johnny-come-lately popping up on day 7.

Melissa reminds me of a post I wrote back in the day (via Donna Darko) on the 10 Things Men Can Do to End Men’s Violence Against Women from the A Call to Men site. That post was lost in the great Slant Truth Self-Destruction of 2007 (you can still see a similar post that I wrote at Thinking Girl’s spot, along with an interesting discussion), so now seems as good a time as any to repost the list for those who missed it the first time around. It’s a good one:

Ten Things Men Can Do To End Men’s Violence Against Women

1. Acknowledge and understand how sexism, male dominance and male privilege lay the foundation for all forms of violence against women.

2. Examine and challenge our individual sexism and the role that we play in supporting men who are abusive.

3. Recognize and stop colluding with other men by getting out of our socially defined roles, and take a stance to end violence against women.

4. Remember that our silence is affirming. When we choose not to speak out against men’s violence, we are supporting it.

5. Educate and re-educate our sons and other young men about our responsibility in ending men’s violence against women.

6.”Break out of the man box”—Challenge traditional images of manhood that stop us from actively taking a stand to end violence against women.

7. Accept and own our responsibility that violence against women will not end until men become part of the solution to end it. We must take an active role in creating a cultural and social shift that no longer tolerates violence against women.

8. Stop supporting the notion that men’s violence against women can end by providing treatment for individual men. Mental illness, lack of anger management skills, chemical dependency, stress, etc… are only excuses for men’s behavior. Violence against women is rooted in the historic oppression of women and the outgrowth of the socialization of men.

9. Take responsibility for creating appropriate and effective ways to develop systems to educate and hold men accountable.

10. Create systems of accountability to women in your community. Violence against women will end only when we take direction from those who understand it most—women.

So dudes, read it, understand it, read it again, and then get to work. And remember, this is not easy work. We’re talking about a lifetime of institutional and societal forces that we are trying to break free of. Sometimes we will fail. If we were perfect feminist allies, we wouldn’t need this list in the first place, dig?